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Chess

Posted by cortelyounext on Sun Feb 17 13:01:25 2019

I have decided to try and become a chess champion. My goal is to begin at regional events then work my way up to the U.S. Juniors followed by the Nationals and finally, if all goes well, the Worlds - I am allowing myself 5 years to reach that zenith or nadir one of those things.

I am reading Endgame about the life of Bobby Fischer and I hope to follow in his path with the exception of becoming an anti-Semite. To wit, I am currently working on variations of both the Ruy Lopez and the Queen's Gambit which allow for quick development of the center squares followed by attack. Once I conquer those openings, I will be well on my way to achieving my ultimate goal of International Grandmaster and World Champion. As of 171758Z(Universal Time Coordinated) FEB 19 I think I am already a better player than any of you people; at worst, I am in the 5th or 95th percentile whichever one of those is the good one.

I have failed at pretty much every undertaking in my life but this time I am confident of success. I do not need nor want your support and encouragement as this is not a joint venture. So do not be all like "Hey, c-rtely-unext, remember me from SubChat?" once I become famous because I will see right through it understand that.

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(1602086)

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Re: Chess

Posted by chicagomotorman on Sun Feb 17 15:27:08 2019, in response to Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Sun Feb 17 13:01:25 2019.

How touching.

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(1602095)

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Re: Chess

Posted by cortelyounext on Sun Feb 17 16:15:01 2019, in response to Re: Chess, posted by chicagomotorman on Sun Feb 17 15:27:08 2019.

Thank you.

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(1602096)

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Re: Checkers

Posted by Spider-Pig on Sun Feb 17 16:29:51 2019, in response to Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Sun Feb 17 13:01:25 2019.



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(1602097)

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Re: Chess

Posted by LuchAAA on Sun Feb 17 16:31:04 2019, in response to Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Sun Feb 17 13:01:25 2019.

My goal

should be to reduce your exposure to omega 6 fats and increase omega 3.

Your need a dietary intervention.

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(1602133)

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Re: Checkers

Posted by BILLBKLYN on Sun Feb 17 19:37:43 2019, in response to Re: Checkers, posted by Spider-Pig on Sun Feb 17 16:29:51 2019.

Nixon's "Dante"

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(1602136)

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Re: Chess

Posted by TransitChuckG on Sun Feb 17 19:51:43 2019, in response to Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Sun Feb 17 13:01:25 2019.

Best wishes to you and to achieve your goal! cortelyounext

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(1602168)

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Re: Checkers

Posted by Spider-Pig on Sun Feb 17 22:19:06 2019, in response to Re: Checkers, posted by BILLBKLYN on Sun Feb 17 19:37:43 2019.

I get it.

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(1602207)

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Re: Chequers

Posted by AlM on Mon Feb 18 03:28:15 2019, in response to Re: Checkers, posted by Spider-Pig on Sun Feb 17 16:29:51 2019.

Chequers



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(1602246)

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Re: Chess

Posted by cortelyounext on Mon Feb 18 09:37:49 2019, in response to Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Sun Feb 17 13:01:25 2019.

My first sanctioned match was just scheduled for next month at the Westfield (NJ) Chess Club. There will be 26 participants with the preliminary round consisting of two games, one white and one black, determined in the aggregate.

The initial pairings have been finalized - I think I am in trouble. At first glance all appeared well and it appeared to be certain victory for me. My opponent? Some 12 year old juvenile from Metuchen. The problem arose once I began to read the accompanying biography. The individual in question, hereafter referred to as IQ out of an abundance of caution and for the sake of brevity and privacy concerns, is a "Top-Tier Junior - National Master, Candidate Master (norms based)", according to the U.S. Chess Federation ranking.

Bottom line? This is not going to end well for me. I am admittedly floating this information out there well ahead of time as a trial balloon so the inevitable attacks withering assaults call it what you will from you people will be expected and, thus, easier to handle. I know where I stand in the eyes of pretty much everyone on this board and I am ready, willing, and able to defend myself against the brutal assault you are going to launch against my person after I get annihilated by IQ as sure as the sun rises in the eastern sky. I am no shrinking violet understand that.

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(1602250)

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Re: Chess

Posted by Olog-hai on Mon Feb 18 09:52:31 2019, in response to Re: Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Mon Feb 18 09:37:49 2019.

I like the sound of "Elephant Gambit" and "Fried Liver Attack".

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(1602288)

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Re: Czechs

Posted by BILLBKLYN on Mon Feb 18 10:38:46 2019, in response to Re: Chequers, posted by AlM on Mon Feb 18 03:28:15 2019.

That country in Central Europe that has good beer and hot women!

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(1602457)

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Re: Chess

Posted by cortelyounext on Mon Feb 18 14:57:28 2019, in response to Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Sun Feb 17 13:01:25 2019.

I just now finished researching and analyzing the "Game of the Century" played between the formidable Grandmaster Donald Byrne and the 13 year old anti-Semite Bobby Fischer at the Rosenwald Memorial Tournament which took place at the Marshall Chess Club in New York City on October 17, 1956. Byrne played white and utilized the Hungarian Attack opening. The anti-Semite Fischer countered with the Three Knights Variation of the Greenfield Defense for development and subsequent attack. The anti-Semite Fischer defeated Byrne. The strategy employed by the anti-Semite Fischer was as utterly brilliant as it was unprecedented. The game went as follows:.

1. Nf3 Nf6 2. c4 g6 3. Nc3 Bg7 4. d4 O-O 5. Bf4 d5 6. Qb3 dxc4 7. Qxc4 c6 8. e4 Nbd7 9. Rd1 Nb6 10. Qc5 Bg4 11. Bg5 Na4 12. Qa3 Nxc3 13. bxc3 Nxe4 14. Bxe7 Qb6 15. Bc4 Nxc3 16. Bc5 Rfe8+ 17. Kf1 Be6 18. Bxb6 Bxc4+ 19. Kg1 Ne2+ 20. Kf1 Nxd4+ 21. Kg1 Ne2+ 22. Kf1 Nc3+ 23. Kg1 axb6 24. Qb4 Ra4 25. Qxb6 Nxd1 26. h3 Rxa2 27. Kh2 Nxf2 28. Re1 Rxe1 29. Qd8+ Bf8 30. Nxe1 Bd5 31. Nf3 Ne4 32. Qb8 b5 33. h4 h5 34. Ne5 Kg7 35. Kg1 Bc5+ 36. Kf1 Ng3+ 37. Ke1 Bb4+ 38. Kd1 Bb3+ 39. Kc1 Ne2+ 40. Kb1 Nc3+ 41. Kc1 Rc2#

I am grasping at straws as I continue my meticulous preparation, futile though it may be, for the preliminary against that 12 year old out of Metuchen. I know I am going to get annihilated but I just do not want to get humiliated in front of the masses.

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(1604664)

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Re: Chess

Posted by cortelyounext on Mon Feb 25 17:02:45 2019, in response to Re: Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Mon Feb 18 09:37:49 2019.

This afternoon, after careful consideration and in consultation with my peers, I made the difficult decision to withdraw from the tournament at the Westfield Chess Club. As if the ridiculous ability of the 12 year old juvenile from Metuchen I was up against was not enough to convince me otherwise, I reviewed the biographies of the other 24 players. IQ is nowhere near the highest ranked player and, in the immortal words of the guy who whacked Pesci in Goodfellas, that's that. Despite the loss of my $500 entry fee I decided to cut my losses and get out of there.

My track record in the entrepreneurial arts is, to put it mildly, abysmal but I am going to prove the naysayers wrong. I am already working on another business venture which I am not at liberty to discuss at this point in time but am confident will succeed - I will discuss the matter at a time and place of my choosing. I am also refining the ironing board design from a handful of years ago so I can develop a functioning prototype which will lead to a licensing agreement and probably make me wealthy in a matter of a few short years.

I have been told I do not think these things through with a clear mind and that is why I fail.

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(1610008)

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Re: Chess

Posted by cortelyounext on Mon Mar 18 18:04:07 2019, in response to Re: Chess, posted by cortelyounext on Mon Feb 25 17:02:45 2019.

I was taught early on that you throw enough shit against the wall something is bound to stick. Evidently, that line of reasoning does not apply to me. I continue to try different things to better my lot in life only to come up short at an alarming almost unfathomable rate. The law of averages? Not so much. My prospects to further myself, like my mind, are dim.

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