Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds

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Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds
Posted by Orange Blossom Special on Tue Aug 11 18:24:30 2026 A terrifying theory claims that the world will suddenly lose gravity for a handful of seconds on Wednesday, sending all life into a panic as billions float off the ground. The wild conspiracy, which has been widely shared online since December 2025, alleged that NASA secretly detected the gravitational waves of two black holes which collided millions of years ago heading toward Earth like a killer beam of energy. Those waves would be so powerful that they would cancel out the force which holds all life from simply floating off the planet for 7.3 seconds at 10.33am ET on August 12, 2026. Knowledge of the world-changing catastrophe was allegedly kept hidden in a classified NASA document called Project Anchor. Images of the supposedly leaked document from 2024 claimed that the space agency was working on a $89 billion plan to expand underground bunkers, install hidden tethering systems on critical buildings and prepare for up to 900 million deaths as people worldwide came crashing back down to Earth after seven seconds of zero gravity. https://www.dailymail.com/sciencetech/article-16045235/earth-lose-gravity-cosmic-catastrophe.html They had me until they claimed NASA got 89 billion for anything.
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Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds
Posted by Spider-Pig* on Tue Aug 11 18:26:57 2026, in response to Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds, posted by Orange Blossom Special on Tue Aug 11 18:24:30 2026.* OPEN THE SCHOOLS
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Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds
Posted by BILLBKLYN* on Tue Aug 11 19:42:14 2026, in response to Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds, posted by Orange Blossom Special on Tue Aug 11 18:24:30 2026.* I'll have to make sure I send my wife outside to sweep during that time
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Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds
Posted by AlM* on Wed Aug 12 08:44:10 2026, in response to Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds, posted by Orange Blossom Special on Tue Aug 11 18:24:30 2026.* Thank you for the warning. Gives me time to tether myself to something unmovable later this morning. :)
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Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds
Posted by cortelyounext* on Wed Aug 12 10:12:26 2026, in response to Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds, posted by AlM on Wed Aug 12 08:44:10 2026.* I am all set. I bolted down whatever I thought capable of floating such as pieces of wicker furniture and other stuff like that in case there is an earthquake at DTG 121433Z (Universal Time Coordinated) AUG 26 that or which generates some inertia or upward movement that or which, simultaneous with the loss of gravity, gives flight to said stuff before it all comes crashing back down much like my life as presently constituted. This is just another in a long line of disasters I need to deal with in the hope I somehow come out of it relatively unscathed.
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Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds
Posted by cortelyounext* on Wed Aug 12 12:53:48 2026, in response to Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds, posted by cortelyounext on Wed Aug 12 10:12:26 2026.* I am back and none the worse for wear. I did not notice and/or feel any loss of gravity at 1033 hours and there was no discernible dislodgment of nothing. So for all you haters out there who as sure as the sun rises in the east and sets in the west are going to launch unwarranted personal attacks at me and impugn my character for taking reasonable precautions, you all can go to hell.
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Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds
Posted by cortelyounext* on Thu Aug 13 10:36:53 2026, in response to Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds, posted by Orange Blossom Special on Tue Aug 11 18:24:30 2026.* To all you climate ~~catastrophe~~ change deniers, the impact of the loss of gravity is directly related to man-made sorry person-made climate change because heat is less dense than cold and therefore unsecured items are lifted higher into the air, that is assuming there is a piece of inertia that triggers movement, and come crashing down back to earth from greater heights when the gravity comes back. On a related note, El Niño and La Niña are both caused by climate change as are the record-breaking heat and record-breaking cold and the record-breaking precipitation and record-breaking drought. We Progressive Democrats got it all covered. Join us.
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Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds
Posted by Olog-hai* on Thu Aug 13 11:42:45 2026, in response to Re: Earth to lose gravity tomorrow for seven seconds, posted by cortelyounext on Thu Aug 13 10:36:53 2026.* LOL! First recorded El Neenyo goes back to the 1500s.
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